The Girl Who's Never Had a Hamburger

Me_baconSo hey, I’m Heather, and I have an interesting relationship with food. There’s much to tell, but I’ll try to sum up here on the requisite “About” page, and perhaps write posts on particular topics in the future.

I work as the creative director for a magazine, but have a wide range of interests besides art/design — collecting (vintage goods, seashells, t-shirts), animals (I have three awesome cats!) — but especially… food.

It’s important to note that I’ve been around influential food scenes my entire life. My parents once owned a concession trailer, and I spent much of my childhood traveling to different carnivals and fairs every week. I was often allowed to roam these events alone, a few bucks in hand to plunk down for my favorite goodies. One memory that stands out is trying Dippin’ Dots for the first time, shortly after they had debuted, at the DuQuoin State Fair.

In 1990, my family purchased a restaurant in a historic tourist town, and later purchased a second restaurant in a nearby area, which we still own today. My teenage and college-age years were largely spent in the restaurant’s kitchen, often as a line cook, but sometimes just experimenting for myself — dropping random stuff into the fryers (I was deep-frying Oreos long before they became trendy, folks!) or coming up with new combinations like french fries and peppermint icing (Surprisingly good!).

Alton is the shizz!With the advent of the Food Network, I started to learn more about cooking and ingredients, admittedly hooked to shows like Good Eats (Alton Brown is still my hero.). Even today, although the channel is largely game shows and “reality” TV, I watch a few select shows, and tend to put it on in the background while I’m working or trying to fall asleep. It’s strangely soothing, seriously!

Now, there’s a certain irony to all of this, because I’m a picky eater. Not just your average person who doesn’t like pickles on their sandwich, or even a vegetarian who purposely excludes meat from their diet. Recently, some studies have called it “Selective Eating Disorder.” I have a short list of foods I’m willing to eat, and when it comes to trying anything new, I will usually only try some sort of variation or combination of those foods. I’ve never had a hamburger, or a salad, or seafood, or most vegetables. My diet largely consists of pizza (plain cheese, please), chicken (white meat only), french fries/potatoes, pasta, cheeses, breads, fruits, and… junk food. I’m well-known for my love of chips, candy, cake, ice cream, popcorn, and cookies. But even in those areas I’m picky about flavors. Yep, most five-year-olds have a more diverse diet than I do.

I’m not embarrassed by my eating habits, though it can make ordering food and social situations a bit difficult. I find myself trying to explain it a lot, and people don’t quite understand, but that’s okay. It’s my deal. So to sum up, I love learning about food I won’t eat, and have a great deal of knowledge when it comes to cooking, but have a limited diet. It’s a weird thing, I know.

These traits are similar among picky eaters, and no, you won’t find reviews here of the latest Super Gobble Cheeseburger Deluxe Special (me trying a hamburger just ain’t gonna happen), but I do hope to expand my eating horizons just a bit for the blog. My reviews of fast food, junk food, grocery items, carnival treats, and restaurants are honest and how they apply to MY palate. But rest assured, I sure as heck know my way around a bag of Doritos.

Love and Cheese Dust,

1 Response

  1. Shannon says:

    I have never had a hamburger either! Our diets are basically the same, although I do eat seafood (lobster, shrimp, crab, breaded calamari). I don’t eat red meat, or pork (other than bacon or ham at Christmas) I don’t even eat turkey. I eat chicken rarely and it’s usually breaded and between two buns with cheese and some lettuce. I will eat a grilled cheese or a bowl of mac and cheese anywhere I go. I don’t eat eggs. I will cook with onions and peppers, but won’t eat them unless they are diced and cooked. I love french fries! Cover with shredded cheese and dip them in ketchup. I’m a cream cheese-aholic. I make dip and eat with plain pita triangles. Pasta should be a food group. I eat toast and butter for breakfast like my mom has her whole life. My pizza will always be cheese only. Sometimes I will go crazy and put some feta on for saltiness.
    Great to stumble on your blog! I look forward to reading it.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *